With the success of Thor both in the US and around the world, Aussie actor Chris Hemsworth has come to the attention of many. For most guys it’s because he gave a great performance as the titular thunder god, combining charm and charisma to keep an epic character grounded in a very human performance..
For some guys and most girls however, he came to their attention because this-
I swear, when I saw the movie and this scene came on I actually felt the air rush out of the theatre as half the audience gasped.
Anyway, regardless of how aroused or confused a shirtless Hemsworth makes you, you have to admit the dude got in some serious shape. And, at least some of you out there have seen that and are inspired. And those of you who aren’t inspired to make a shrine are inspired to get in the same sort of shape as Hemsworth did.
Now, if you google “Thor Workout” you’ll already see hundreds of links with people claiming to have the actual workout routine used by Hemsworth to bulk up for the movie. They are, of course, lying. But here at olilolo, we’ve used our best industrial espionage techniques to bring you the ACTUAL, GENUINE THOR WORKOUT. This isn’t like all those other workouts out there that make you do difficult and painful exercises, this one is totally easy! It only has, like, four steps! Follow them EXACTLY, and you too can attain a godly physique!
Be born happy, healthy, in a first world country with good muscle and bone structure. Avoid being weak, weedy, hunchbacked, or anything other than strapping and well-formed. As you grow, make sure to eat plenty of vegetables, eggs, and supermarket chicken, chock-full of those valuable growth hormones.
Become a movie star. This may involve work as a child actor, or possibly a little later, but don’t wait to long. You want to work your way through soaps or TV dramas in your teens before moving on to Hollywood by your mid-to-late 20s.
Get cast in a movie that requires you to become massive. If you’re good-looking this will probably be for a superhero or action movie. If you’re not so good looking this will probably
be for the same type of film, but as the bad guy.
Take full advantage of the studio appointed fitness trainers, weapons masters, nutritionists and small man who yells at you if you even LOOK at a cupcake. Spend all day, every day in the gym, because this is literally your job and you have nothing else to take up your time.
And there you have it. After around six months of constant workouts with professional trainers, you’ll be in the best shape of your life, and ready to take on a whole horde of frost giants!
Protip- to maintain your physique, try to get re-cast in the role, hopefully as part of a franchise, or if that isn’t possible, then in a series of similar roles. Then, simply repeat steps two to four as necessary.